I will always love you!
by awsder
Summary: What happend after Lily accepted Bart's proposal?
1. Chapter 1

It has been two weeks since Lily accepted Bart's proposal, instead of going away with Rufus. Since then, she is persecuted by nightmares and sleepless nights; she lived in a kind of trance and didn't take part in life. Since their engagement, not even Bart was there for her since, as before, he was on a business trip, again. Her children had their own lives, and so she was all alone again.  
But also Rufus didn't feel very well since then, however, at least he found solace by taking care of his children, by cooking for them and recently he started flipping through old photo albums of their old time together. He wondered if Lily still had their memories and especially her camera, or had she thrown away everything?

Dan interrupted his thoughts: "Dad, I'm going out with Serena, do not wait for me."

"Okay, you two have fun,"

"Thank you, see you later."

"Bye"!

When he arrived at the Palace hotel, Lily opened the door.

"Oh, hi, Dan. Serena is still in her room for getting ready, she will be ready soon." She tried to put on an indifferent face and smiled.

Dan: "Okay, I'll wait then."

Lily: "Come in", she turned around and led him to the couch. He sat down across from her and looked at her searchingly. She looked tired; despite the make-up you could see the dark circles around her eyes. She also looked unhappy, even if she is able to cover that fact in a classy way.

"It is none of my business but are you okay Mrs Van der Woodsen?"

She looked surprised: "Yes, why not? And you can call me Lily ".

Dan: " You look tired."

"Uh, well ... today was a hard day." At this point, Serena came into the room and greeted her boyfriend with a kiss. Lily, who was instantly reminded of her time with Rufus felt a stab in her heart. She turned away, and when she noticed that tears gathered in her eyes, she stood up quickly and said, "Have fun you two." Then she rushed out of the room. Dan watched her in surprise, and then he and Serena left the hotel and headed to their date.

When Lily reached her bedroom she burst into tears and crouched on her bed. She wondered whether a person could die of a broken heart. Then she fell asleep, but there was again the horrific nightmare that she had just for some time. She saw herself and Rufus at a young age, happy, but then her mother came and suddenly Rufus disappeared, her mother cackled. Lily screamed and cried, but Rufus did not come back. Then there was a cut and she saw herself and Rufus of today, happy, but then came Serena and said: "Please, Mom, Dan is the most important thing in my life, please do not, not this time" And this time Rufus disappeared too and left a desperate Lily. At this point, she mostly woke up. She woke up with a scream. She looked at the clock and noticed that she had only slept for an hour. She stood up and picked up a bottle of red wine, the only consolation remained. She opened it and poured herself a glass. After half a bottle of wine she had an idea. Slightly tumbling, she went to her closet and found a shoebox. She went back to couch and opened it. And now she reminisced about the best time of her life, she was looking at old photos and her old camera with which she had made so many beautiful shots. But with the memories the pain came back, she drank the whole bottle and realized how difficult it was to move her limbs. She stretched out on the couch and fell within a few seconds into a deep sleep.

Since the bar they wanted to go had temporarily closed, they popped to Dans. Rufus was still sitting on the couch and looked up in surprise when he saw who entered the loft. They were in a conversation and did not notice him.

Serena: "And that is your fault, you can't deny it!"

Dan: "Yeah, I give up, you won! Oh what I wanted to ask you, how's your mother, is she all right? She looks kind of sick"

Serena: "You have noticed that?! Well,… I do not know exactly what the matter is, but for two weeks she behaves like that. She stays in bed until noon, does nothing all day, and in the evening she drinks a few glasses of wine or whatever. Slowly I'm worried, but she speaks to no one. And her thoughts are always somewhere else. And at night she cries herself to sleep."

Dan:" Hmm, but you should definitely try to talk to her ... Oh, hi dad. "  
"Hello, what are you doing here? Not that I am not amused."

Dan:" All right, the bar was closed. We are in my room." So they both went into Dan's room.

Rufus wondered, if Lily was really that bad going, he should perhaps hook up with her once in a while. But if she wanted to talk, she could have called. He decided to call her. He grabbed his cell phone and when she did not answer, he left her a message on the mailbox: "Hey Lil, I do not know if you want to talk to me, but if you need me ... I'm here for you." Satisfied, he hung up, so she knew that he was there for her, but she still could decide whether she wanted to talk to him.

Two hours later, Dan saw Serena home. They entered the suite and saw Lily lying on the couch, all over the table and on the floor were distributed photos and an empty wine bottle was forgotten under the table.

Serena: "Mom." Lily did not answer, so she went next to her and shook her shoulder. Slowly Lily began to move. She opened her eyes, and looked glass-eyed into her daughters face: "Ahrrm." She moaned.

"Hey Mom, look at me" Serena shook her and shouted at her: "You're ruining yourself if you go on like this. Stop it, I can not take it anymore!"

Lily clutched at her head; she could not think clearly and saw blurry. She tried to say something, "Yes, I have ... yet ... I want to ... I mean ..." She just could not think straight.

Serena yelled, "Mom, please! Listen to me, you have to stop."

Dan grabbed her arm reassuringly: "Let it be, she needs to rest. You can talk to her tomorrow."

Serena stopped for a moment and then she said: "... Okay ... you're right."

They took Lily between them and led her into her room. She moaned softly as they laid her to bed, and murmured, "Thank you." Then they left the room and closed the door went back into the living room.

Dan said, "I never have seen her like this. I thought she was really like she pretends to be. Indestructible, confident and perfect."

"Ha, my mom is anything but that. She is probably the most insecure person I know. She only tries to hide her weakness"

"I feel sorry for her."

Serena: "Well, if you think so... She feels miserable but does not speak about it." Then her eyes fell on the photos. "What is that?" She picked some of them up.

Dan: "Serena, don't do that. I don't think she wants us to look at her photos."

Serena: "Well, bad luck! Then she should have watched out ... Whoa, look." She sat on the couch, Dan sat next to her. "Look, this is my mom and Rufus."

Dan: "Show me. True. Somehow, I have a bad feeling about this "

Serena replied:". Oh come on, don't be a drag! I would love to learn something about the past of my mother, she never even told me." They began to look through the photos; there were a lot of concerts and people they did not know. In the next two photos, you could see Lily and Rufus. In the first picture they kissed and in the second picture they are in a tight embrace and looked at each other fully in love. When Serena looked at the back side of the second photo it suddenly hit her like a blow, there was written: "I will always love you!"

"Dan ..."

Dan: "What? You all right? "

" Oh God, it's my entire fault! I am guilty!"

Dan: "What? What's up?" Serena: "Look how happy they were. Why am I so blind and stupid?! I'm so selfish! No way, how could I do that!"

Dan: "Serena, what's going on? Tell me! "

Serena began to tell: " On the day when Mom accepted Bart's proposal, she actually wanted to go away with your dad."

Dan: "What?"

Serena: "Keep listening! As I found out, I begged her to stay, because I didn't want to put our relationship at risk. So I told her I'd rather be Chuck's stepsister, than yours. You see, I have begged her not to start anything with Rufus. I said that, she could hook up with anyone but him. Because you're the most important thing in my life. Oh what have I done?!"

First, Dan was speechless, and then he embraced his girlfriend and said: "That was not selfish! You were just scared. Do not blame yourself!"

Serena: "But, otherwise they would be happy now."

Dan:" But it's not too late." Serena: "What do you mean?"

Dan: "Lily is not married yet, so there's still hope." "But she is engaged to Bart Bass. And then what about us? Try to imagine the two would come together effectively? How do you imagine that? Cozy family dinner? That would be super funny!"

Dan: "Oh come on, don't exaggerate! We will find a solution! Don't worry. But you could you bear to watch your Mom's unhappiness?"

Serena: "No, of course not. I suppose you're right! I'll talk to her tomorrow."

Dan:" Okay, I'm off now. Kiss!" They kissed passionately and Dan left the hotel.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning, Rufus was already in the kitchen and made waffles as Dan entered the living room. He looked at his father, Rufus who noticed the suspicious look of his son asked: "What is it, do I have jam stuck on my face?"

Dan: "No, it's nothing… When will Jenny actually be back?"

Rufus: "She's coming tomorrow with Eric from Hudson again. And hey, do you think you could distract me?"

Dan: "Yeah, don't annoy me please. I will tell you right now. Well,…yesterday when I brought Serena home, there happened something."

Rufus: "You two had sex? That's normal at your age, but I hope you used a condom?"

Dan: "Oah, Dad, you're disgusting."

Rufus: "What? Am I not allowed to ask you?"

Dan, a little annoyed: "Can you please be serious for once?"

Rufus smiled: "Yes, I'll try!", he put on a serious expression.

Dan shot him a look and shook his head, then he continued: "Nothing happened with Serena, it was her mother."

"What? You had sex with Lily?"

"Daaaaad, please! Shut up! Otherwise I won't tell you anything!"

Rufus: "Fine. I'll be quite!"

Dan: "Finally! So, I've never saw her like this. She laid on the couch as we walked in. And she drank an entire bottle of wine. Serena was angry and she shouted that Lily should stop doing, otherwise she will destroy herself."

Now Rufus was a bit worried: "And what did she say?"

Dan: "Nothing, because she was drunk. We got her into bed and then we went back to the living room. And in the living room, there were many photos all over the floor."

Dan looked his father right in the eyes and said: "Old photos of both of you."

Rufus was touched, so she had kept the pictures and even looked at them.

He answered: "Ah, but you know that we were together, or should I remind you on our wonderful Thanksgiving-dinner?"

Dan: "Yes, I know that. Just let me talk. We've looked through the photos and suddenly Serena was getting nervous and she said that it was her fault that Lily is so sad and desperate. I asked her why she thought so, and she said that Lily actually wanted to go on a trip with you the day Bart proposed to her."

Rufus looked away and felt again that stab in his heart: "Yes, that's right."

Dan: "Well, Serena told me, Lily didn't leave with you because Serena had begged her to stay and to do nothing with you, because of us, Serena and me. She'd rather be Chuck's stepsister than mine, she told her mother."

Rufus: "Ouch!"

Dan: "Yes, I know, it wasn't likeable but she regrets. I advised her to speak with Lily. And that we'll manage it somehow. And dad?"

Rufus: "Yeah?"

Dan: "Do you love her?"

Rufus, wondering what to say, was for the truth, and nodded: "Yes."

Dan: "Okay, then try to make it up to her!" He grinned at him: "Come on, Don't lose any time! Breakfast I can do it by myself."

Rufus had to grin; his son was just so mature: "Okay, see you later!" He left the loft and went to the Palace Hotel.


	3. Chapter 3

Meanwhile, in the hotel, Lily awoke with a groan, her head was pounding and she felt slightly ill. She turned to the side and saw Serena lying beside her, who awoke too: "Good morning, Mom, tough night?" She said with a grin.

Lily: "... Um, I do not know what to say. Well, thank and I'm sorr ..." Suddenly she felt rumblings in her stomach jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom, just in time to throw up in the toilet. She felt if she had just vomited everything out of her entire self. When she finished, she stood up, she was still a bit dim and washed her mouth and went back into the bedroom, where she collapsed on the bed.

Serena: "Are you okay?"

Lily: "Yeah." she touched her head. "Have you slept the whole night next to me?" Serena: "Yes, I didn't want you to be all alone, since we have found you like that." Lily: "Thank you, that was nice. Dan was there, too, right?" She asked insecure.

Serena: "Yes."

Lily: "Oh, how embarrassing."

Serena: "Mom, don't worry. Dan would never adjudge someone; he was the one who stopped me from yelling at you."

Lily: "But, even if that's so, it's still very embarrassing! But thank you, I don't know what I was thinking by doing this…again. But I'm constantly alone, Bart is never there, and if he is here, he has always something to do."

Serena, a bit surprised by this confession of her mother: "I understand, but why do you act like yesterday? That doesn't help you!" She looked into her mother's eyes. Lily: "But, it numbs the pain." Lily looked to the side, while Serena asked: "What pain?" Lily's eyes filled with tears. Suddenly Serena remembered the photos.

"Uh, Mom? After you got to bed, we were still in the living room and we saw your old photos." Lily blushed. " The photos of Rufus and you. And I just wanted to say how sorry I am."

Lily: "Sorry for what?"

Serena: "I begged you to accept Bart's proposal instead of going away with Rufus. I was so selfish and I just thought about myself. I never thought that you could really love him."

Lily: "Oh, I understood why you asked me, because you love Dan, that wasn't selfish!"

Serena: "But Mom, because of me you are sad and devastated." Lily's eyes filled again with tears. What had she just done?! Her own daughter feels guilty for her own unhappiness: "Serena, it's not your fault; I'm just not strong enough."

Serena: "You aren't strong enough for what? For your love to Rufus? Mom, you have to be with him, I have seen the photos and I have never seen you happier!"

Lily: "But it's too late! And what about you and Dan?"

Serena: "Please, don't worry about us, we have talked about. Indeed it would be very strange, but what the heck? We'll manage that!"

Lily: "You're so good! I'm so proud of you, not just because of this. You're become such a great person since you are back. And I'll never forgive myself that I was such a bad and uncaring mother for you and your brother!"

Serena: "You're not a bad mother! Anyway you improved!" They embraced.

Serena: "When will Eric be home, actually?" She asked for her brother.

Lily: "Tomorrow, he will return with Jenny from Hudson. Although I am not a fan of the fact that he lives with Allison. But she is a caring mother and will be nice to him, 'cause she just hates me."

Serena: "Oh, shucks, she doesn't hate you! Well, but now get a quick shower and then you know what you have to do."

Lily: "Thank you, Serena, really!"

Lily took a shower and got ready, then she left the suite. In the elevator, she looked at her phone and saw that Rufus had left a message. She listened: "Hey Lil, I do not know if you want to talk with me, but if you need me ... I'm here."

Oh, how could she think, to be able to live without him? How could she ever leave him? She could hardly wait to see him.

.


	4. Chapter 4

She left the hotel and was about to cross the square in front of the hotel, when she suddenly saw him. He looked at her and went up to her. When they faced each other, he said: "Lil Hi, how are you?"

Lily: "Rufus ..." What should she say. She looked him in the eyes and suddenly she felt an incredible despair and her heart sank. Then she burst into tears. Rufus who was quite surprised and shocked, partly because she rarely showed her feelings, but mainly because it was in public and everybody could see her like this. He led her to a bench. He held her tightly and whispered soothing words. After a while she looked up and said: "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't say yes to Bart, I shouldn't have left you all those years ago! "

Rufus: "Lil, it will be all right!"

Lily: "I don't know ..." she managed to say.

Rufus: "Lil, hey, look at me!" She lifted her head and looked him straight in the eyes. "It will be fine! Please, listen to your heart once. Decide what you think is best. Dan told me why you haven't left with me." Lily's eyes filled with tears again.

Lily: "I'm so sorry, but I couldn't put the happiness of my own daughter behind my own. I don't want to be like my mother..."

"You're definitely not like Cece. You're wonderful."

She smiled at him sadly: "I wish I would have been always there for my children, but I wasn't. I have always pushed them away and permanently I had new partners ... "

Rufus: "Lil, it may change. And you've changed! But trust your feelings and not your rationality."

Lily: "Yes, I do not love him, I don't want to marry him and I won't!"

It took a load of Rufus mind: "So what?"

Lily continued: "It is Chuck, he is like a son. And everyone sees him only as the devil, but he is such a great and sensitive boy I'm going to hurt him, and he will hate me forever."

Rufus: "And that's why you want to marry B? I understand that, but why do you want to continue to live unhappy? And we both know that it would lead to your fourth divorce because…"

Lily: "Oh Rufus, you're right, Bart is never with me, he is always on business trips and when he's here, he has just working on his mind. I 'm lonely; I do not want to be alone!"

Rufus: "Lily, claim your life, just live like you want to."

Lily: "Yes." She looked at him and then said. "I love you, Rufus Humphrey. I love you so much, you are the best person I've ever known."

Rufus: "I love you too my Tiger Lily"

She laughed: "This time was so incredibly fun and wonderful!"

Rufus: "Yeah indeed it was, and especially our trip to Saya Lida" he winked at her. She smiled at him, lost in the beautiful memories of the old days. Rufus squeezed her hand, his heart was beating very fast. Finally she had admitted her feelings, he was the happiest man in the world!

She looked at him and said: "I promised Serena to tell her so I'll head back home. See you later?"

Rufus: "Yes, every time you want." He smiled at her. They hugged again and he gave her a kiss on the cheek. She turned around and walked towards the entrance. Then she turned back to him, waving happily. Rufus had to chuckle, he loved his Lily. Relieved and satisfied he headed back to the loft.


	5. Chapter 5

What they do not know was that someone had overheard their entire conversation. Chuck and Blair were close but out of sight and had heard everything. Chuck was furious and upset: "That bitch, what is she doing?"

Blair: "Chuck calm down, she hasn't said anything mean."

Chuck: "Nothing mean? Are you stupid? She wants to leave my father for this silly wretch! Haven't you noticed that? This whore."

Blair: "Chuck! It's your soon-to-be-stepmother, so don't be mean."

Chuck: "Why me? I am NOT mean!"

Blair, a little annoyed: "Haven't you heard? She said, she want you to be her son and therefore she hasn't left Bart yet. And she knows how your true self is."

Chuck: "Ha. Her son! Are you kidding? I just can't help myself to stop laughing! And my true self? She doesn't know anything about me!"

Blair: "Chuck! Think about it. She always was the only one who protected you and who understood your behavior. And she knows you well. You are not this bad boy you pretend to be. And I know that you love her too! You can't deny it!"

Chuck: "That bitch has no right to talk about me. She is cheating on my father, after all."

Blair: " It's not cheating, she just wants to leave him."

Chuck: "Well, ..."

Blair: "You're just so angry because you would like to have her as your mother, and you're afraid that she will turn away from you, if she isn't with your father anymore. Am I right?"

Chuck: "It's none of your business, anyway."

Blair: "Wow Chuck, come back down, I've just tried to help you!" With this, she turned around and stomped off to meet her best friend Serena in their favorite café. Chuck stopped and thought about what B had told him. Was she perhaps right and he was just afraid of losing Lily? But still, she couldn't change her mind every day! He decided to talk to her later this day.

After Lily had spoken with Serena, she felt as free and happy as she never felt for a long time. Serena, who was still wondering about this new situation, left the building to meet her best friend Blair. Lily phoned Rufus, after a short time, he answered. "Hey, it's me." She began

Rufus: "Hey, are you OK?"

Lily: "Yes, thank you."

Silence…

Rufus: "Lil?"

Lily: "Yes?"

Rufus: "Are you going out with me?"

This question was unexpected, somehow. She was lost for words. She wondered what would happen if someone would catch them, Bart would be very pissed. She weighed the pros and cons and came to the conclusion that it'd be just a date with a good friend... This could at least be an explanation if they would have to justify themselves. "Okay."

Rufus: "Really?"

Lily: "You seem to be surprised. If you don't want to, I'll cancel and…"

Rufus had to laugh: "Lily, shut up."

Lily: "Well, if you act like a jerk I'll think of it." She grinned, ah, she missed him so much!

Rufus: "I'm sorry. Mrs. Van der Woodsen would you please do me a favor and go out with me?"

Lily: "Ah, much better. So I think I could accept."

Rufus: "Cool, I'll pick you up at eight. Be ready then."

Lily: "Yeah, do not worry." She laughed. They said their goodbyes and both felt as curious and exciting as 20 years ago.

20 years, so much time had passed but they felt as nothing had ever changed. Rufus caught himself while thinking how his life would be if they never broke up all those years ago. But he rejected the idea again, because otherwise he wouldn't have Dan and Jenny, and he would never exchange them for anything in the world.


	6. Chapter 6

Meanwhile, Serena and Blair met in their favorite café. Serena arrived a little late and said to her best friend: "Sorry, my mom stopped me. I hope you are not waiting that long?"

Blair said ironically: "Ah, it's your moms fault that you're late. Of course!" She rolled her eyes.

Serena insisted: "Yes, it is! She wanted to discuss something with me."

Blair: "Okay, all right. Me too, I want to discuss something with you."

Serena: "Tell me." She took a sip of her cappuccino which Blair had already ordered.

Blair: "Um, actually, it concerns Chuck, or rather Bart, or rather, well, not quite."

Serena: "B, don't hem and haw, just tell me!"

Blair: "Well okay." And thus she began to relate what she and Chuck had heard. Serena was shocked: "What? Chuck got it? Shit. I need to call my mom immediately!"

Blair tried to appease her friend: "Calm down first, I don't think Chuck will run to his father and tell him everything he heard, the two of them haven't got a well-functioning father- son relationship, have they?"

Serena: "Nevertheless, it can cause horrible consequences."

Blair: "Why? Bart has to know sooner or later, anyway."

Serena: "Yes, but not now." With that she pulled out her cell phone and dialed her mother's number. Once Lily answered the call, Serena told her everything. Lily was getting very nervous and asked: "Do you think he'll say something to Bart?"

At this point Serena answered as Blair did before: "Mom, I don't think Chuck will run to his father and tell him everything he heard, the two of them haven't got exactly what you can call a good father- son relationship, have they?" Lily still seemed not to be reassured and said: "I'll talk to him."

Serena: "If you think so. See you later." She hung up.

Blair: "I think you Van der Woodsen's have a crush on the Humphrey's. You are dating Dan, your mother loves Rufus and Eric is best friend with little J." She laughed.

Serena shot her a look: "Please Blair, don't make fun of this! It's weird enough!"

Then they began chatting and gossiping around and just enjoyed the afternoon.

Chuck had just pressed the "send button" when his cell phone beeped. He had sent a tip and a photo to Gossip Girl. The photo he had took earlier of Lily being in Rufus' arms, unnoticed by Blair. If he doesn't want to talk to his father, Bart should at least find out somehow. What does it matter how? At least his father has the right to know that his fiancée is cheating on him. He looked at his phone; it was Lily, who asked him to stop by. He wondered what she could probably want. Did Blair told anyone? Uncertain, he hit the trail.

In the meantime, Lily got dressed for her date with Rufus. She put on a pair of dark jeans and a nice white shirt. Just as she put on earrings, there was a knock at the door. She opened and stood in front of Chuck. Her nervousness increased.

Chuck: "Why do you want me to come?"

Lily: "Uh, come on in. Would you like something to drink?"

Chuck: "No, thank you. So?"

Lily, unsure: "Um, I know that you've overheard us, Rufus and me. And I don't want to change anything between us."

Chuck: "But it's inevitable, if you're no longer with my father!" He replied sour.

Lily was a little shocked by his tone: "Please don't get mad, just listen to me. Of course it'll be different if I would leave your father. However, I meant between us. I love you, like I love my own son and I won't lose you. But I don't want to marry a man I don't love and of whom I will get a divorce sooner or later, anyway. Would you like to be with someone else, even though you knew that you could have Blair?"

He stumbled, from where does she know that he is secretly in love with Blair? Suddenly he felt sorry and guilty that he had sent the tip to Gossip Girl, his only hope was that his father wouldn't check the news.

Chuck said: "Yes, I understand, yes, but probably, I would have liked to have you as my mother."

Lily was touched by his words: "Thank you Chuck, I appreciate this."

Chuck: "Well, I have to go now." They said goodbye and Chuck wondered how to avoid his father seeing the Gossip Girl message. Tomorrow he was on a trip to Beijing, perhaps he was lucky and he wouldn't notice anything.


	7. Chapter 7

Back at the hotel:

Lily tried to decide whether she should put her hair up to a chignon or simply let it fall over her shoulders. When there was again a knocking on the door, she decided to just let it unresolved. She opened the door and Rufus walked in, her heart began to beat faster. "And where are we going?" She asked.

Rufus: "Let yourself be surprised. And what amazes me, why are you done yet?"

Lily rolled her eyes: "You act if it always took me about ten hours."

Rufus: "Yes, don't you remember that night when we actually wanted to go out but it took you that long that it was next day?"

Lily: "Rufus, you're such a liar! First of all, we decided to go away just before midnight and secondly, you weren't fast either, because you still need your guitar strings to be replaced!"

Rufus: "Okay, point for you." They both laughed. They looked deep into their eyes and it crackled.

Rufus: "You look beautiful!"

L blushed. "Thanks, you look hot yourself." She winked at him. Then they left the hotel and took a cab which dropped them off in front of a bar. On the door was written: "The good old days - music of the 80s" Lily looked at Rufus who grinned: "Ready for the old days?"

Lily smiled: "Ready." They walked into the bar and immediately they were received by loud music. They set out on the counter and ordered two drinks. After some time, they started to dance; L hadn't felt this happy for a long time. And also for Rufus it was one of the best nights for long. There were just the two of them and no one else counted. After several dances, they ordered another drink.

Lily eyed Rufus, he said: "What?"

Lily just smiled and said: "Thank you." They looked deep into her eyes, there was again this tension. They leaned forward and their lips met. The kissed first gently and then more passionately. When they broke apart, they struggled for breath and smiled sheepishly. Rufus pulled Lily outside the bar.

He wanted to stop a cab but, strangely, there drove by none, then he phoned the cab company who said they would send one, but it could take some time because of a union strike. So they sat down on a bench and talked, they talked about their past together, about what happened after that, about their children, they talked about everything. They felt able to trust each other with everything of the world.

When the cab arrived, it was already late. Rufus brought Lily back to the hotel. They kissed again and sparkles were flying around. Then he drove home himself. It had become a wonderful night. He just hoped that something like this would happen more often until now.


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning Rufus woke up and was thrilled because his daughter Jenny came back from Hudson, where she had spent a week with her best friend Eric. He got ready and went to Grand Central Station to meet her there. When he arrived at the station, it was just in time, as a blonde woman got out of a cab and walked towards the entrance. He quickened his pace, and when he was next to her, he gave her a pat on her butt and he whispered in her ear: "Hey, Lil." She turned to outrage when she recognized him, she only smiled: "Hello." They looked at each other, again there was this special tension and they had to force to behave normally. It's hard to behave when nobody should suspect anything.

Rufus cleared his throat: "Yesterday was nice."

Lily: "Yes, thank you, it was the best night for a long time."

Rufus couldn't resist any longer, so he pressed Lily into a corner and kissed her briefly on the lips.

Surprised, she kissed him, but said: "Rufus, everybody could see us!"

Rufus: "Sorry, I can't help myself." He gave her a meaningful look.

She had to laugh out loud: "Come on, otherwise Jenny and Eric will wonder where we are." They waited on the departure platform and when the train arrived; their kids hopped out and hugged their respective parent.

Rufus: "And how are you going? Had Allison been nice to you Eric?" He asked with a mischievous look on Lily. She replied with a death glare, she knew exactly what he meant.

A little confused Eric replied: "Yes, it was super funny, she read to us the stories about Millie, they are just sensational!"

Rufus burst out laughing and said: "Yeah, they're quite amazing, aren't they?"

Lily shot him an angry look: "Well, Eric, are you ready to go?"

Eric: "Mom, what are you doing here? Don't get me wrong, I am happy about the fact that you came for me but that is so unlike you."

Lily: "Um, I was thinking today it's time to be nice."

Eric: "Okay…"

Lily: "So come on, move it!"

Jenny: "Mrs. Van der Woodsen, actually we had planned to meet us yet?"

Rufus: "Oh, you didn't spend the last whole week together? Lily, I think they were lying to us and actually they didn't spend the week with Allison in Hudson."

Jenny: "Daaad! How could you ever be so NOT funny! We are good friends who want to spend their last day of school vacation together yet!"

"All right. Then we'll head to the loft?" Jenny and Eric high fived.

Lily: "Well, I'll take your suitcase home."

Eric: "Won't you come with us. So we won't have to tell everything twice and it will be amusing."

Lily: "E, that's impossible ..."

Rufus: "Why not? Come on it'll be fine."

Lily, shot him an exasperated look, but then agreed. So they headed to the loft.

Humphrey-loft:

After they had eaten and Eric and Jenny had told about their week, the two of them moved in Jenny's room. Thus Rufus and Lily were alone in the living room.

Rufus: "Are you free tonight?"

Lily: "Hmm, Bart is coming back from Beijing, but I could make it."

Rufus: "Don't you want to be there when he arrives?"

Lily: "No, why should I? His head is full of work anyway. So he can probably make it a day longer without me, huh?"

Rufus: "If you say so." Lily noticed how his mood changed when Bart's name was mentioned.

Rufus: "When will you tell him?"

Lily: "Soon, I don't know when exactly, I just have to wait for a good time."

Rufus: "And what would be a good time?"

Lily: "Please, Rufus, I don't know yet. But believe me; I'll do it as soon as possible!"

Rufus spirits lifted again: "Okay, what about a movie night?"

Lily: "Sounds great! Me movies, you popcorn?"

Rufus: "Sounds good." He leaned forward to kiss her, but at that moment the door of Jenny's room opened and they entered the living room.

Lily: "If Jenny wants to, she can stay with us today."

"Yeah, thank you!" screamed Jenny and Eric in unison. Rufus grinned; he admired Lily's skill to influence the situation and to control. If Jenny was at Eric's, they were all alone, because Dan and Serena also stayed at the hotel.

Lily: "Okay, we're going to go now. Thank you Rufus for offering the meal." They said goodbye and Lily, Eric and Jenny drove to the hotel.


	9. Chapter 9

**Thank you all for your nice reviews! I am sorry for my bad English but I am not a native speaker… So I hope you will like the following chapter.**

Later the day, Lily got ready for her movie night with Rufus.

Eric asked: "Are you going out?"

Lily: "Yes, I have to go to a meeting of the school committee. Don't go to bed too late. For me, it might take a little longer."

Eric: "Okay, see you then."

"Bye." Lily left the hotel and borrowed some movies. When she knocked at Rufus' front door, he opened and greeted her with a kiss.

"Wow." Lily said as they broke apart. "Good place to stay."

Rufus: "Come on in." Rufus had put pillows and blankets on the bed and lit a few candles. On the coffee table was a bottle of red wine, two glasses and popcorn. "Wow, you've tried pretty hard."

Rufus: "For my Tiger lily just the best!" She smiled at him.

Rufus: "Which movies do you brought?" he took it from her hand and read the titles: 'Silence of the Lambs', 'Pretty in Pink' and 'To Catch a Thief'."

Lily: "Satisfied? I even thought of 'Titanic', but I didn't want to torture you." She joked. Rufus: "Ah, thank God! Which one first?"

Lily: "How about 'Pretty in Pink', then 'Silence of the Lambs' and then 'To Catch a Thief' to recover from 'Silence of the Lambs'?"

"Whatever you want! But you are very optimistic if you think you are keeping up with three movies without falling asleep."

Lily: "Ha, we'll see, I bet I don't fall asleep!" They snuggled down on the couch and watched the first movie.

Lily says dreamily: "The story is almost like ours, only you're Andie and I am Blane." Rufus looked at her and instead of answering, he kissed her. The kiss went more passionate and soon Rufus massaged Lily's breasts. She moaned. And in return she massaged a certain zone in his pants. They rolled around and kissed passionately. But suddenly they fell crashing to the floor. Lily started to laugh hysterically and Rufus had to laugh as well. When they picked up courage, they sat next to each other on the couch and watched the next movie, 'Silence of the Lambs'. Throughout the film, Lily was very stressed and strained. From time to time, she clutched Rufus' arm. Rufus considered it amused, indeed the movie was scary, but Lily always gets caught-up in films. He filled their empty glasses with wine and handed Lily hers. She took it and chugged it. Then she returned to the action. When the film was over Lily yawned.

Rufus: "Tired?"

Lily: "Ha, not at all!" she murmured. She gave him a quick kiss on the lips and then rested her head on his chest; he then brought his arm around her.

Halfway through, Lily had to force herself to keep her eyes open, she was more tired than she had thought. After some time, she wasn't able to fight and her eyes closed slowly while she drifted off to sleep. Her head slid down a bit and Rufus who noticed had to smile by himself. He stroked her forehead and watched the rest of the movie. When the credits started Lily awoke with a start: "No, I fell asleep!"

Rufus: "It doesn't matter."

Lily: "I gotta go home!"

Rufus: "You can stay here. This wouldn't be a problem."

Lily: "No, thank you. The kids would be wondered, especially because I said I was going on a school committee meeting." She yawned. "Thanks Rufus!" and after some time: "I don't know how I could ever live without you!"

Rufus: "Lily, I love you!"

Lily: "I love you too!"

They kissed, then Lily left. At home, she went to bed with a smile on her lips.


	10. Chapter 10

The next morning Lily woke up with terrible headaches. She was surprised because she hadn't actually drunk that much the other day. Probably it was just her migraine. She got up, but had to lean against the wall immediately, because everything went black. She paused for a moment and then walked slowly to the bathroom. There she got her painkillers and swallowed one. When she suddenly feels an acute pain in her head again, she took another. Then she went slowly back to her bedroom and fell powerless to bed. Her head hurt and numbed her senses, shortly after she had fallen asleep again.

But just a few hours later, her door was flung open, and Bart burst into the room. Lily sat up frightened. When she recognized him, she laid back into her pillow and closed her eyes for a moment, as another sharp pain ran through her head. She moaned.

Bart: "I can't believe it. You are still in bed? It's well past noon."

Lily: "I got my migraine." she moaned.

Bart: "Nonsense, it won't be that bad, huh? This afternoon we will go out for dinner and after this we'll go for a charity gala."

Lily: "What? No..." she sat up slowly: "No Bart, not today! I have a hell of a headache and then I'm not up for this."

Bart: "You're not up for this? But that is no reason. Come on, get up and we're going out! "

Lily: "No, and why did you burst in my room anyway?"

Bart: "Keep it in your mind, I own this place."

Lily: "Yes, fine, but still, you don't get the right to come in just like that!"

Bart: "Oh Lily… when we are married, I have a lot of other rights." He grinned at her and her blood runs cold. "But Bart, my head is gonna explode and I don't feel well. You know that I am prone to migraines. Can't we do it another time?"

Bart: "No, we can not, this charity gala is in the Princess Hall only held once a year and we have to be seen there."

Lily: "Can't you go all alone?" She said exasperated, why he wanted her to go out with him, and why the heck did he arrive out of the blue?

Bart: "No, I can't, because we have to make an appearance as a couple in order to prevent any rumors." Ah, that's how the land lies!

Lily: "That is so typical you, just because of your reputation!" she abruptly stood up but had to hold her head, because everything started to spin around.

Bart: "Not just because of mine, because of yours too! Don't be that ungrateful!"

Lily: "Can't we make our appearance another time? Please Bart; I won't be any help anyway."

Bart: "No, we should go today, we'll leave in about an hour. So hurry up!" Then he left the room. With a cry of frustration she made her way to the bathroom and got ready for their dinner.

During the dinner, she felt no headache, though it was extremely boring. She didn't know about what to talk with Bart, and he spoke the whole time anyway about some unimportant and uninteresting things. With Rufus, it had never been like this, even after all this time it was still as all those years ago. Bart startled her out of her reverie: "Are you sure you don't want anything apart from this salad, you haven't eaten all day."

Lily: "Yeah, I'm not hungry and also my head is pounding again, Can't we just go?"

Bart: "Fine, let's head home." So they left the restaurant and made their way to the hotel to get ready for the gala.

When Bart entered Lily's room, she was done, but rested against the wall with her eyes closed.

Bart: "Are you done, can we go?"

Lily: "Yes." She put on a fake smile and cursed Bart by herself, and then she followed him.

When they arrived at the Princess Hall, the migraine was back and her head pounded so hard that she couldn't even see clear, everything was blurry. Lily headed towards the bar and sat down on a stool. But Bart came to her and said: "First we have to greet everyone."

Lily: "Please Bart, my head is hurting very badly, I can't!"

Bart: "Lillian! Pull yourself together! Here, drink this." He handed her a drink.

Lily: "Do you really think that will help?"

Bart: "Lillian, just drink it!" So she drank and felt the alcohol quickly going to her head, it was good, because it calmed the pain a little. She took another and went on with Bart to greet the present people. After a while they met Serena and Dan. Bart was about to talk with a business partner.

Lily: "Hey you two, I didn't know that you're here too. Dan, how did Serena managed to bring you here? I mean it's a fucking boring charity gala, isn't it?"

Serena: "Mom!"

Lily: "What?!" She had to grin.

Dan: "And I always thought you like things like that. Besides, I can't refuse a request of my wonderful girlfriend."

Lily: "Serena you've got good taste! A charming young man." She smiled. "And in fact I believe gala-events to be terrible, but Bart wants me to be here because the society should see us together as a couple. Ridiculous!" She groaned there was a stabbing ache in her head."

Serena: "Is everything all right mom?"

Lily: "Yes, I'm fine. It's just migraine."

Serena: "Then you should go home to lie down and rest."

Lily: "Yes, but Bart doesn't want me to leave. Well, let's see if I can sneak out."

Serena: "Yeah, you should probably do that."

Lily: "Okay, see you later." So Lily turned around and made her way out, she just had to get some fresh air.

Five minutes later, Bart came to her: "Lillian, I hope you won't go yet?"

Lily: "Wow, you are really getting on my nerves. I grab fresh air, because I have my migraine." She said angry.

Bart: "It's all right; you don't have to be angry! Come back with me."

Lily: "No, I'm going home now. I don't feel well."

Bart: "No, you will stay!" He took her arm and pulled her into the hallway.

Lily: "Ouch, you're hurting me, let me go." She tried to escape his grip, but he held her even more tightly, he pulled her into a deserted corridor and spat at her: "It's your fault that we have to make an appearance in public. Would you have behaved, you could now be sleeping in your bed."

Lily: "What do you mean?" she asked in confusion and insecure. Then, looking at his hand, still clutching her arm, she said: "Let me go now, please."

He loosened his grip, pulled out his cell phone and said: "Look at this; in a city with Gossip Girl you can hide nothing!" She looked at the screen and saw a Gossip Girl post with a photo of her in Rufus' arms. It was the day she had her breakdown. There was written: "Spottet: Serena's mother had an emotional breakdown all in public and who did console her? No one less than the father of lonely boy. What happened to the perfect ice queen and will there be a love quadrangle – mother, daughter and father, son? Lily, what will Mr. Bass think about that? You should definitely make up your mind. Former rocker or business man? The father of your daughter's boyfriend's or the devil's father? Try to choose."


	11. Chapter 11

Lily: "You don't really believe in a teen portal, do you?"

Bart: "Why wouldn't I? As yet, almost every post was right, and besides, the photo is proof enough, isn't it?"

Lily: "So what? What is so upsetting, huh?"

Bart: "Hmm, let me think about it ... You are lying in the arms of another man and as if this wasn't enough this man is your ex-lover. So, I don't know what is so upsetting about it when you are actually engaged to me? "

Lily: "Don't be rude like this! It's not that I cheated on you."

Bart: "Good for you! Your behavior makes me think if I should keep you from meeting this scum."

Another pain shot through her head, but this time Lily didn't know, whether it was because of the migraine, or because of the words she had just heard.

Lily: "You can't tell me whom to meet and who I am not allowed to. And Rufus is not scum!" She broke away and walked past him. But all of the sudden, Bart grabbed her arm, pulled her back and pushed her against the wall. She cried out briefly in shock: "What is this!"

He took her face between his hands: "You will stay here as long as I want you to. It's good we're getting married soon, then I will certainly control that your actions and behavior." Eyes wide, she looked at him. She did know he wasn't quite the nicest man on earth but she didn't know that he could be violent and that mean.

Lily: "Do you really think I want to marry you yet, if you act like this?" She shouldn't have said that, because his hand hit her suddenly in the face, she screamed.

But before she could say anything, he hissed: "You know I'm a powerful man with good connections ..." Lily looked at him in disbelief, he continued: "Therefore, you should assume you better watch out what you do and with whom you'll do it."

She couldn't believe it, he threatened her. He looked into her eyes and suddenly Lily got scared. Why did she always have to end up in such a shitty mess? She felt her blood rushing in her ears and her heart pounding.

Bart: "Have you understood my love?" She gulped and nodded. Convinced that Lily had learned her lesson, he left her alone and went back into the hall. Lily was distraught; she was trembling and got weak in the knees. She slumped down and leaned against the wall. She closed her eyes and waited for the pounding to stop, but it pounded that hard in her head that she could barely think. She stood up slowly and staggered back into the hall where she sat down on a stool at the bar. She ordered a drink, but nothing went better, she remained simply and rested her head on her hands. The barkeeper asked: "Are you okay ma'am?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." She managed to say.

Since they have arrived, Dan and Serena spent all the time on the dance floor, but now they were thirsty.

Dan: "I'll get us something to drink, just wait a minute." He gave her a quick kiss on the lips and made his way to the bar. He saw Lily and went to her: "Hey." He looked her in the face and was startled, she was pale and her eyes were glassy, she also gritted her teeth as if she was in pain. "Lily, what's wrong?"

She looked at him and brought out: "Migraine ... dizzy ... sick." The rest he didn't understand. He said: "You have to go home immediately!" She didn't answer. Dan turned to his girlfriend and waved her nearer.

When she arrived she cried: "Mom, you look really sick."

Dan: "Yes Serena, we need to bring her home."

Serena: "Okay, come on." They left the hall with Lily leaning on them. Lily didn't notice nothing much, her mind was completely befuddled by the pain. In the entrance hall, everything began to turn, she collapsed and passed out. They carried her to the outside and hailed a cab. When they were seated, Serena said: "Palace Hotel please."

Lily who had regain consciousness began to shiver and said in panic: "No, not the hotel!"

Serena: "Well, at Bart's?"

Lily: "No, no, please don't. I'm afraid. Not. To. Bart."

Serena: "Shhh. It's all right." She spoke to her mother.

The taxi driver asked, now a little impatient: "Could you please decide?!"

Dan looked helplessly to his girlfriend.

However, she had an idea and said: "Brooklyn, please." She looked at her friend and smiled whimsically.


	12. Chapter 12

During the drive, Lily leaned at Serena's shoulder who stroked her mother's head worried. When they arrived, they paid the cab driver and managed to get Lily out of the car, then Dan lifted her up and they claimed the stairs to the loft and entered. Jenny and Eric, who had just watched a film, were astonished when they saw who was entering the loft. Rufus, who was in his room for don't disturbing Jenny and Eric, heard voices from next door:

Jenny: "What are you doing here?"

Eric: "What's wrong with Mom?"

Serena: "Hello to you too!"

Dan: "She has got migraines and so she has to rest."

Eric: "But why here?"

Lily is here? Rufus' heart began to beat faster, but why doesn't she speak herself? He walked out of his room and saw the kids still undecided about what to do. Dan who was still holding Lily in his arms, asked insecure: "Dad, what should we do? Please help us!"

Rufus looked at them puzzled: "What is going on here?" When she noticed his voice, Lily groaned: "Rufus…" Dan laid her down on the couch.

"What should we do with her?" He asked again.

Rufus kneeled in front of her, took her head in his hands and shook her slightly: "Lil, do you have your migraines?" She didn't move.

Rufus: "Lily, do you hear me?" Then she opened her eyes slightly and nodded. He went into the kitchen, poured some water into a glass and added a pill. He came back and sat next to Lily on the couch. He straightened her up and helped her to drink.

She grimaced: "Yuck!"

Rufus: "Lily, you need to drink that. Afterwards you are going to be better." Reluctantly, she drank the whole glass and sank back exhausted. Dan, Serena, Jenny and Eric were helpless.

Jenny: "Dad, can we help?"

Rufus: "No, it's okay. Lily could sleep in my bed and I'll sleep on the couch." With these words, he lifted her up and carried her over into his room. There he laid her on the bed. She still wore her gown. He hesitated for a moment but finally undressed her; and instead of her gown he put her on one of his shirts. When he covered her, she clung to him. Surprised, he looked down at her.

She murmured: "Stay with me." When she didn't let him go, he laid down beside her. Lily snuggled up to him and rested her head on his chest and held him tightly. Soon after she was about to drift off to sleep, she whispered: "I love you." Rufus stroked her through her hair and kissed her cheek.

The others, who overheard the last part, felt a little uncomfortable. But then they went all together in Dan's and Jenny's rooms that could be connected through the garage where they were chatting a bit and finally went to sleep.

In the meantime, the charity gala drew to a close. Bart looked for Lily who he has seen sitting at the bar some time ago. He didn't found her. He searched everywhere, in front of the hall, at the entrance, in the dressing room and even in the lady's room, but she was nowhere to be found. He got mad, this little bitch sneaked away without telling him! She was obviously not thinking about the consequences of her behavior. He left the gala and headed to the Palace Hotel. Once there, he entered Lily's suite, but no one was there, not even Eric or Serena. He called her, no answer. Pissed off, he went home.  
There he tried to reach her two more times, but when she didn't answer as well, he left her a message: "Lillian, where are you? Once you listen to this message, I want you to come immediately to me. We need to talk!" He hung up and went to bed, angry but a bit worried too.


	13. Chapter 13

The next morning, Rufus woke up because his daughter cried: "Eric, let it be, that's disgusting." Eric laughed. Rufus turned to the other side and saw Lily lying beside him, her eyes were closed, yet she looked as peaceful and sweet as a baby. He watched her for a while, then another scream came from the kitchen and Lily stirred and opened her eyes. She looked at him and smiled: "Good morning."

Rufus: "Good morning. Are you feeling better?"

Lily: "Yes, I feel like a new person. Thank you."

Rufus: "That's good!" Their eyes locked. Their hearts beat faster and there was a crackling tension between them. Rufus leaned forward and their lips met. It was a passionate kiss, when they broke apart, they were both breathless. They smiled in embarrassment.

Lily: "We should get up."

Rufus replied: "Oh, I think it's quite comfortable here." She shot him a look, then she stood up and noticed by then that she was wearing one of his T-shirts.

She looked at him astonished: "You got me undressed?!" It was rather a statement than a question.

Rufus: "Yeah, what's wrong with that?"

Lily: "Um." She didn't know what to say.

Rufus continued: "First, you are wearing still your underwear, secondly, it wouldn't have been the first time I saw you naked, and thirdly, would it have been better if you slept in your Gucci dress?"

Lily had to laugh and raised her hands: "It's all right, I said nothing."

Rufus: "Well, are you hungry?"

Lily: "Yes, I am starving!"

Rufus: "Come on, we'll see what the kids have." So he was out the door and went into the kitchen.

She called after him: "Yes sir, but wait for your consort to look after the children." She ran after him, but stopped dead in her tracks and blushed when she noticed all of their children. She only hoped that they hadn't heard her last comment.

Eric laughed: "It seems to us that you're feeling better mom?"

Lily went red as a beet and sat down: "Um, yes." They began to eat breakfast in silence, until Lily asked: "Actually, why did you take me here instead of the hotel?" Serena and Dan looked at each other in surprise.

Serena: "We wanted to ask you the same question."

Lily: "Me?"

Serena: "Yes. When we were in the cab and wanted to head to the Palace, you were anxious about something and you have stammered that you that you were afraid and didn't want to go there."

Lily looked at her disbelievingly: "What? And why were we together in a cab?"

Serena: "You can't remember?"

Lily said helplessly: "I don't know… maybe just a little bit."

Now Dan began to tell: "We picked you up at the bar, you seemed to be semi-conscious. Then we hailed a cab but you didn't want to go to the Palace or to Bart's, so we headed to the loft and my dad tucked you into bed. When he wanted to leave you alone, you've clung to him and wanted him to stay with you." Lily felt very uncomfortable and her cheeks got hot like fire. How could she act like this?

She began: "Oh, I'm sorry that you always have to meet me in my bad phases." She laughed nervously and embarrassed: "And Dan, you are probably thinking anyway I'm completely freaked out and stupid." She lowered her head and looked at her hands.

Dan: "Oh, shucks, that's nothing to me! In addition, it's not your fault that you had your migraines yesterday. And you were sick, so you mustn't be ashamed!"

Lily looked up and smiled: "Thank you."

Serena remarked archly: "However, you should have a look in a mirror, your makeup is all over your face."

Lily stood up from her chair: "What? Why didn't you mention it before? Oh no!" Rufus started laughing and the others joined in. Lily faced him gave him an angry look: "And you! You were the first person seeing me this morning, but you didn't think and tell me? Idiot!" Thus he had to laugh even harder. She threw a waffle at him and went into the bathroom.

Rufus grumbled: "Hey, my waffles, you don't deserve them at all!"

A "Oh cry, me a river!" came back from the bathroom. Jenny, Eric, Serena, and Dan all collapsed with laughter. After some time, Lily refreshed herself and joined them at the table.

Eric joked around: "That's much better mom! And the dress suits you way better than the large T-shirt."

Lily replied: "Want to be grounded?"

Serena: "Oh, that reminds me, I still have your phone, you've lost in the cab last night. Bart called, it felt like 100 times and I think he left you a message." All of the sudden, Lily remembered everything, Bart, who had forced her to stay and slapped her. Her face hardened. What could he want? She bet he was angry that she just took off yesterday. And what will he do?

Eric startled her out of her thoughts: "Mom? Serena asked you a question."

Lily: "Uh, yes?"

Serena: "Why did Bart actually want you to stay instead of letting you rest?"

Lily said sarcastically: "Well, my lately behavior hasn't been convenient to Mr. Bart Bass, so he thought we should make an appearance in New York's high society."

Rufus interjected: "And Lillian Van der Woodsen listens to that? That's not the Lily I know!"

She looked at him thoughtfully: "Bart Bass is a powerful man ... But what the heck, I'll check my mailbox." She went into another room and listened to her voice mail: "Lillian, where are you? Once you listen to this message, I want you to come immediately to me. We need to talk!" Bart's cold and angry voice curdled her blood. She had to go to appease him. Why it always has to be so complicated? Anyway, she just hoped Bart won't be that angry. She went back to the others and said nervously: "I gotta go."

Eric: "Why?"

Lily: "I don't know exactly. It has something to do with Bass Industries." She opened the door.

Rufus followed her and asked: "Are you okay? You seem to be nervous."

Lily: "Yes, yes, thank you. And thank you for yesterday." She smiled sheepishly.

Rufus said quietly: "No problem. I am always here for you." And then a bit louder: "Okay, bye." Lily left and he turned to the others: "Well, we will continue our breakfast though."

Lily was nervous, she couldn't think clearly. When the taxi stopped in front of Bass Industries she got off with a slight sense of fear. She took the elevator and knocked on Bart's office door. "Yes." She heard his voice from inside. She opened the door and entered the room.

Bart shot her a cold look: "Hello Lily, I am glad to see you finally decide to meet me." Lily: "Bart ..."

Bart: "What! You should have let me know that you left the charity gala already! Especially because I asked you not to."

Slowly Lily became angry: "Bart ... I had migraines and you were going to force me to stay there. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you, but I was sick, okay?"

Bart replied angry as well: "But you were not even answering my calls. And anyway, where have you been?"

This question was unexpected. She hadn't yet considered an excuse. What should she say; tell lies or the truth?

Bart asked impatiently: "So?"

Finally, she decided to tell the truth, because Bart had his spies everywhere, probably he hired also someone to go after her: "Serena and Dan have picked me up last night and taken to Dan's." She looked at him anxiously.

Bart was red in the face and said with clenched teeth: "Dan Humphrey? Right? So your so called friend Rufus is his father?!" Lily just looked at him and nodded shy. Bart raised his right arm and slapped her right into the face. The blow came so unexpectedly that she staggered back a bit and gasped. She looked at him frightened and in disbelief.

Bart: "Yes, now you are being in for a surprise! I have to teach you impeccable manners!"

Her cheek ached terribly, but slowly she composed herself again and screamed: "You bastard, how could you do that to me? I hate you! How could I ever accept your proposal?! I will never marry you, never!"

Bart had to smile at her sudden outbrust: "But Lily, don't be so angry. I'm so sorry! Can you forgive me?"

Lily: "What? You hit me twice and you want ME to forgive YOU?"

Bart: "Lillian, it didn't mean to, please, it won't happen again."

Silence.

Lily: "I am leaving you."

Silence.

Bart: "But I love you."

Lily: "I'm sorry, but I can't marry you."

Bart said sadly: "It's him. You love him, right?"

She nodded: "I'm sorry." She pulled the ring from his finger and gave him.

He took it from her: "I'm sorry!"

Lily hugged him and said: "Thank you for letting me go." Then she left the office building relieved and drove back to the loft.

Long she had not felt so relieved; she could have jumped for joy. Finally it was all sorted out and she and Rufus could finally be together. The others were still having their breakfast, when suddenly there was a knock at the door. Rufus got up and opened. He was surprised by a stormy Lily, which fell into his arms and kissed him passionately.

"Yuck, Mom! Please. Was that necessary?" Serena said, and the other grimaced as well. Lily blushed.

Rufus: "Wow, for what is that?"

Lily turned to him again: "I left Bart!" About Rufus face was spreading a wide grin and he lifted Lily up and kissed her on the mouth.

Jenny: "Uah, that's enough! I'm out. What's wrong with you guys today?!" Jenny got up and left the loft, followed by the others.

Rufus: "Well…Is it really that disgusting, when we kiss?"

Lily: "At least we know what to do if we want to be alone." They laughed and kissed again.

After that Lily told him about her conversation with Bart.

Rufus interrupted her horrified: "Wait, what he hit you?"

Lily: "Yes… but then he was really nice and let me go. Actually I feel a bit guilty… But I am so glad we're finally together."

Rufus: "I love you Lily, I will always love you!"

She looked at him in love and kissed him tentatively on the lips. Then she said: "I'm sorry."

Rufus puzzled: "Sorry for what?"

Lily: "For everything, that I have left you all those years ago, just because my mother put me under pressure ..."

Rufus: "Lil, it's okay."

Lily: "…And that I chose Bart over you a few weeks ago and accepted his proposal instead of going away with you." She looked at him sadly: "I suppose I still have to learn how to be happy."

Rufus: "Lily, what matters is now and we will fix it."

Lily: "You can not imagine how much I love you Rufus Humphrey!"

He smiled at her and started trying to do the dishes. Lily hugged him from behind: "Let's do the dishes afterwards. I am not in the mood of cleaning plates and mugs!" Rufus: "Where's the problem? I will just wash the few plates quickly…"

Lily: "Oh please!" She began to massage him. First his back, then she went down the sides and came to his stomach, then a little lower and Rufus groaned: "Lily, that's not fair!"

Lily: "All is fair in love and war!" She continued. Rufus stopped doing the dishes and dried his hands. Then he turned around quickly and pressed Lily against the kitchen counter.

Startled, she let out a little cry: "Rufus!" He covered her with kisses and ran his hands over her hips, her waist until he reached her breasts. He squeezed her slightly and began to massage her breasts in a circular motion. L groaned. They kissed passionately and breathing faster. Rufus pushed up her skirt as she opened his pants. He picked her up and she entwined her legs around his body. They stumbled into the living room where they collapsed on the sofa.

Throughout their love act, they were whispering caresses to each other and covered their entire bodies with kisses.

Everything was forgotten, there were only the two of them. They were happy and free. It has taken 20 years, but finally they made it. They stayed for a long time entwined on the sofa and snuggled together. They talked about their past and laughed a lot.


	14. Chapter 14

In the meantime, Dan, Serena, Eric and Jenny were having ice cream and talking about their parents.

Jenny: "Dan, why haven't you told us about Lily and dad before yesterday?"

Dan: "Sorry, but we didn't know exactly what was going between them."

Eric: "Well, thanks to mom's weird appearance we know it right now."

Serena: "Yes, unfortunately, I could definitely live without. That's for sure."

Dan: "Come on, it's not that bad, is it?"

Serena: "Hmm."

Jenny: "I agree with Serena, it's strange though. And I don't want to have to face the two of them all the time. It's more than enough to see you two lovebirds making out. I don't think I could bear Lily and Dad... Uh, ugg!"

Eric: "Come on, we can get along with that. And anyway, mom's relationships never last very long."

Serena: "Hahaha, E. You know exactly that it's something different than usual. Mom loves Rufus as no one before."

Eric: "I was just kidding! You take it too seriously!"

Dan: "Eric is right; we shouldn't see the worst." He kissed Serena. Then they went back to the loft.

As they entered the loft, Lily and Rufus were just going to wash the remaining plates. Rufus: "Ah, you dare going back again!"

Dan: "Very funny, Dad!"

Lily blushed and said sheepishly: "It was ... I was just ... Um ... Well ... it should be ..." Helplessly she looked at Rufus.

He said: "Well, Lily and I, we're a couple now and we hope you can handle it."

Jenny murmured: "There is no option. We have to like it or lump it."

Rufus: "What did you say, Jenny?"

Jenny, caught: "Uh, nothing dad. I am happy for you and we will manage it somehow!"

Rufus: "Fine."

Lily: "Serena, I am sorry, I tried but I can't fight anymore."

Serena: "Mom, it's fine. I won't blame you for taking your chance in true love." She smiled at her and then left with Dan. Jenny and Eric disappeared in Jenny's room.

Rufus: "I have to work in the gallery. How about a family dinner tonight? I could do my famous chili?"

Lily smiled: "That sound great! Okay, I wanted to meet Eleanor anyway." She gave him a kiss on the mouth and disappeared outside.

Rufus prepared his chili and then he left for the gallery. He had received a new delivery, and now he had to put the paintings in the index and hang them up on the walls. This takes the whole day.

Lily, meanwhile, met with her friend Eleanor who was Blair's mother. They had a cup of coffee and chatted.

Eleanor: "You look happy. Are the wedding plans going out well?"

Lily was embarrassed and replied: "...Um, no. Actually I left Bart… today."

Eleanor: "What the… How come?"

Lily: "I do not love him."

Eleanor: "Oh, fine, but I always thought that's not that important to you…" She saw the crush on Lily's face and added: "Ah, now I understand. Who is it?"

Lily: "Who is what?"

Eleanor: "Well, your new lawyer, doctor or businessman."

Lily: "Eleanor! How can you be so cheap! Besides he is different from everyone else." Eleanor: "So there's someone!"

Lily: "Screw you! Yes I'm seeing someone. Satisfied?"

Eleanor: "Do I know him? Who is it?"

Lily blushed.

Eleanor: "Woah! I know! I know! It's the guy who accompanies you to my party! Is that right?"

Lily went even redder in the face: "Yes."

Eleanor: "At least once, you've chosen a handsome guy. What's his name?"

Lily: "Rufus... Humphrey."

Eleanor: "Wait what? It's the father of Serena's boyfriend, isn't it?"

Lily said quiet: "Yes."

Eleanor smirked but said: "How could you?!"

Lily: "I know this is weird, but what can I do?"

Eleanor: "You seem to be in love with him."

Lily: "Yes, I love him, as I have never loved anyone before."

Eleanor: "I just hope that it'll last longer this time."

Lily dreamily: "Believe me, it will."

After that, they talked a little about their daughters, and the latest gossip of New York's high society. Then L left and made a few errands. When she finished she decided to see Rufus at his gallery.

Rufus was just about to hang up one of the last paintings, when he heard footsteps behind him. He turned around to the entrance and saw Lily with a big grin on her face: "Are you finished yet?"

Rufus: "No, not yet."

Lily: "Do you need a little distraction?" She walked up to him and kissed him. He returned the kiss and soon it was again wild and passionate. Rufus pulled Lily in the next room. There were some blankets and pillows on the floor. Lily looked at him skeptically.

Rufus: "These are still the blankets for projection on the ceiling." L nodded. Then they were all over each other again. They rolled on the floor and played and teased each other. Then they had sex.

When they were done, they were out of breath lying next to each other on the floor. Lily: "Wow."

Rufus: "Same," They cuddled together and soon Rufus was fast asleep and Lily was sleepy too. She listened to his breath and closed her eyes then she dozed off.

About an hour later, Lily woke up and looked at her phone watch. It was already 8 pm and at 7.30 they had arranged to meet with their children to have dinner.

She shook Rufus out of his sleep: "Rufus! Get up, we're late."

Rufus: "Mmm, Lil. What's up?"

Lily: "Rufus, we're running late, it's already 8 pm!"

Rufus: "What the fuck! Shit!" They hurried and arrived ten minutes later at the loft where the others were waiting impatiently.

Eric: "Ah, finally!"

Dan: "We have been waiting for half an hour."

Rufus: "Yeah, sorry, we were distracted."

Jenny grimaced: "Ouah, I can imagine so."

Eric: "Eww. I can't get the picture out of my head. Jenny, how can say something that disgusting!"

Rufus cleared his throat: "Thanks that you think we are disgusting. But well. Who wants the best chili in the world?"

Luckily, Rufus had already prepared his chili, so they could immediately start eating. The dinner was peaceful and they had fun. They felt like a big family.

After dinner, everyone went back to his room. Lily and Rufus snuggled in bed and started massaging each other.

Lily: "I'm happier than I've been for a long time."

Rufus: "Me too! Finally you're mine again."

She turned to him and smiled at him. They leaned forward and started kissing. Soon after, Lily was fiddling about Rufus's pants and unzipped it. She fulfilled his desire, but just until he was close. Then she let go of him and looked at him invitingly. He understood and caressed and squeezed her thighs up to her clit. Lily groaned, and then he gently entered a finger and began to make her happy. But he pulled his finger out again shortly before she was close. Both were turned on and fell over each other like wild animals. They groaned and struggled for breath. Later, they fell back into their pillows, satisfied and were fast asleep.


	15. Chapter 15

**Hey everyone. I know, it has been a while since I updated the story. I'm sorry. I hope you like this chapter and please bear with me in case of mistakes because I am not a native english speaker and this is my first story. So I hope you enjoy it and I would appreciate some reviews :)**

The next morning Rufus woke up first and watched Lily who was in his arms and blessed to sleep. She had a slight smile on her lips. She was so beautiful. Every time he was with her, he felt as a teenager, he still felt the same tingle as it used to be all those years ago. He gave her a kiss on the forehead whereby she stirred and opened her eyes. She looked at him drowsy and Rufus said: "Good morning, my beauty."

Lily: "Morning." Her stomach grumbled.

Rufus: "Are you hungry?"

Lily nodded.

Rufus: "Okay, then let's have breakfast."

Lily: "But I would rather stay in bed with you." She winked at him.

Rufus had to grin: "Last night, it wasn't good enough?"

Lily: "Of course, it was great! But we could do it again?"

Rufus: "That's a good idea, but not until after breakfast. Besides, the children have to be gone." Lily pouted but got up and pulled on a sweater. Then they left the room. The children were sitting at the counter and have their breakfast. Lily and Rufus sat down.

Serena gave her mother a pissed-off look, and said: "I hope you spent a great night!" With this, she and Dan left without a word. Surprised they looked after them.

Lily: "What was that about?"

Jenny cleared her throat and said to Eric: "E, are you ready to go?"

They got up and headed to the door, at the door Eric turned around and said: "If you should have the urge to do the nasty anytime soon, please note that this is a loft, and no bunker!" Then they walked out.

Lily winced: "Oh my gosh, they overheard us. No, that can't be true!"

Rufus laughed.

Lily bashfully: "Don't laugh! It's not funny. Ahww, this is so embarrassing!"

Rufus: "Lil, don't take this to serious!"

Lily said sarcastically: "Haha, it's hilarious! I'll die laughing. But don't worry something like that won't happen again!"

Rufus horrified: "What? Do you mean no sex?"

Lily laughed: "Fiddlesticks! You're such a fool. We'll just watch out and make it when we are all alone."

Rufus: "Ah, I understand. So just like now?" With these words, he lifted her up and carried her to the bed where they made love.

The next few days, Lily and Rufus stayed sometimes at the loft and sometimes at the hotel and kept a low profile when it comes to their sex life. They took every chance they could get, to fulfill their sexual lust. Of course when none of the children was around. They get it on in the kitchen, on the couch, in the shower, in the morning, afternoon, evening, at night. Heck, once even in the elevator, this one time, when they have entered the hotel room after making love, Serena looked skeptically but said nothing.

One evening, when Rufus and Lily were in bed, Rufus suggested: "Lily, let's go out just like the old times."

Lily: "I don't know… Couldn't we just stay in?"

Rufus: "What happened to my Lily? Are you about to become boring?"

Lily: "Ha, no way! Tomorrow night I'll show you who the bore is."

Rufus grinned; Lily could be fooled easily yet again: "Okay, tomorrow you'll show me if you're still my Tiger Lily."

Lily: "You bet!"

The next night they were getting ready. Rufus put on jeans, a V-neck T-shirt and leather jacket. Lily had opted for a pair of jeans, a tight low-cut top and her leather jacket. Rufus looked her over and then stated: "Wow, hot!"

Lily blushed slightly: "Psst." Jenny and Eric walked into the room.

Jenny: "Wow, Lily. You look great."

Lily answers shyly: "Thank you, Jenny."

Eric grinned.

Lily: "What?"

Eric: "Nothing it's just that I've never seen you in an attire like this.. but it looks good on you."

Lily: "Well, we'd better be off now. See you."

Then they left to revive the old times. First, they went back to the bar where they were on their first date.

They danced like crazy. After three songs, Rufus said breathlessly: "I am thirsty. What about you?"

Lily nodded and they went to the bar to order their drinks. They poured it down quickly and then returned to the dance floor. Now, there was playing a slow song and they moved back and forth in close embrace. Lily laid her head on Rufus shoulder and he held her by the hips. They locked eyes and leaned into a tender kiss. They took their hands, ordered two more drinks and went to a quiet place. There they continued kissing but this time it was more passionate.

Soon the kiss turned out in a stormy making out. Rufus began to squeeze Lily's breasts.

Lily: "Stop doing that Rufus! Anyone can see this!"

Rufus: "I thought you were going to show me that you're still the old Lily. But all I see is a snobbish Upper East Sider in leather jacket."

Lily snorted: "Ha, just wait! The night is still young." She pulled away from him and walked over to the bar, he followed her: "Lil, what are you doing?"

Lily: "Just wait." Lightning-fast Lily reached across the counter and grabbed a bottle of tequila, then they ran out of the bar. The bartender shouted something after them, but they didn't understand. Gasping, they stopped two blocks away. Lily grinned.

Rufus: "I have to admit that this was more like the old Lily, but ..." Lily pulled him close and they kissed again. She pushed him into an alley and began to unzip his pants.

Rufus: "What are you up to?" Lily just looked at him and then continued. Soon after he groaned: "Oh Lil, that's so good. Yes!"

Lily let go of him: "But afterwards it's my turn!"

Rufus: "Yeah, but go ahead."

After some time, Lily stopped and looked at him expectantly. Rufus understood, in within seconds he pressed her against the wall. He slid his hand under her shirt first, then her bra and massaged her breasts. Then his hands slid down into her pants. Suddenly she moaned loudly: "Oh yeah! Uohh. Please go on!"

As their needs were satisfied, they fixed their clothes.

With a look at the tequila bottle Rufus asked: "What are we going to do?"

Lily: "Well, what do you think?" She trailed him behind her until they found another bar which they entered. They sat down at a table. Lily got them two glasses and filled them with tequila. They clinked glasses and drank.

Rufus: "Look over there, that guy."

Lily: "Yes, what about him?"

Rufus: "He is constantly looking over here; I bet he has a crush on you." They watched him for a while and it was true, he kept glancing over to them.

Lily: "Or he likes YOU."

Rufus: "You must be kidding."

Lily had to laugh: "Fine. I've got an idea. Every time he looks over, we'll have a shot."

Rufus: "Are you sure that you are able to hold you liquor?"

Lily: "Yes I am. Go! He's looking." They downed their drinks and filled them again.

Two minutes later, Rufus: "That is it!" They tossed their glasses of tequila again.

Lily: "Again!" The more often the guy glanced over the harder they had to laugh. Besides, the alcohol fueled their mood as well.

After some time, Rufus said: "Oh, the boddle is almost empty!"

Lily giggled: "Tee-hee, hehehe. It's true. I think I need to gooo to the toilet."

She stood up: "Wow, evrrything is spinning around..." She laughed. Rufus got up and he realized that he swayed slightly. He took Lily to the ladies room. She weaved into and came back out after a few minutes.

Lily: "Hi, here I aham. Can we pls leave Rufush, sweetheart. Hehe sweet…heart."

Rufus: "Okay. Let'sh head home." As they passed their table, Lily grabbed the bottle and tossed the remaining tequila.

Rufus: "Lilllly, don't ya remember? You've a low tolerance of alcohol."

Lily: "Oh shucks, othrwise it wouldve been such a waste!" She giggled. Rufus rolled his eyes, he had forgotten what it's like when Lily is completely drunk; and both of them seemed to be over the limit. They went outside.

Lily: "Rufasss?"

Rufus: "Hmm?"

Lily gave him a quick peck on the lips and whispered: "I love you." She hiccupped.

Rufus: "I love you too."

Lily smirked at him: "So?"

Rufus: "What?"

Lily: "Have I been a goood Tiger Lilll? I mean Tiger Li-ly.?"

Rufus laughed: "Of course you were! Let's go home now." They walked a few steps, but Lily couldn't walk straight.

Lily: "Ruhfuss. I cannot walk." She giggled hysterically. "I cannot walk straight. I can't walk nor go nor run. Hahahaha."

Rufus: "Oh Lil, you had to much, you're blind drunk." Lily shook her head and spoke like a little child: "Thatsh not truehe, and you are druhunk ash well. Besides, I feel good."

Rufus: "Shhh. Keep it down!"

Lily pouted: "Fine, I won't say anything." Rufus lifted her up and gave her a piggyback.

Lily: "Oh, you are sooooho strong!" They went to the loft which was fortunately nearby.

At the loft door, Rufus fumbled with key, but eventually he was able to unlock the door. When they were inside, he sat Lily down. She tried to sit on a stool, what didn't succeed. She fell to the floor and the stool made a big noise. By that, Jenny and Dan woke up and wanted to look where that noise came from. As they entered the room, they saw Rufus trying to help Lily stand up who was still giggling on the floor.

Dan asked puzzled: "Are you okay? Can we help you?"

Rufus: "Oh hi! No thank you. It's just Lily. She had a little too much to drink."

Lily: "Not at alllll! It's not my fault. And anywahey, Rufus is drunk too." She giggled.

Jenny: "Oh my god. What's gotten into them?!"

Dan: "Well, I think we'll just have to ignore their attitude. Like it or not."

Jenny: "Oh please! It can't be true."

Rufus: "Go back to bed. Good night!"

Lily laughed: "Ha ha, Good night!."

Dan: "Good night!"

Jenny: "If S finds out, she will freak out."

Dan joked: "Why? Because our parents had too much to drink and act like teenagers? Don't you dare to tell her or you'll never be happy again."

Jenny laughs: "Well, she is your girlfriend and she'll find out eventually. And then I don't want to be in Lily's skin. I feel kinda sorry for her. First Serena complained about Lily's typical cold Upper East Side attitude and now that she is having fun and shows feelings she is unsatisfied too."

Dan: "Hey, don't talk about my girlfriend like that!"

Jenny: "It wasn't supposed to seem mean. I just said what I think... Well, good night." Dan: "Good Night Sis."  
In the living room:  
Lily moaned: "Rufus, I am sooooo tired!"

Rufus sarcastically: "can this be true? After the many drinks you had?"

Lily yawning: "Funny!"

Rufus lifted her up. She clutched him and closed her eyes. Rufus shook her slightly: "Hey Lily. Do not fall asleep!"

Lily: "Hmm."

Rufus: "Lil come on!"

Lily: "Oh ..." He lay down on the couch with her and soon both were fast asleep.


End file.
